Ende Ammavan

"Pain Demands to be Felt" for those of you who have seen the movie "The Fault in Our Stars" you know what i mean and you know in what context i say this next post

For the past few years i had a good friend called RC ..we were intimate although we rarely had sex, just once in the 3 years that i knew him. He was a silent, introverted and a totally submissive guy who looked more like a lab skeleton than a human being. As a person he was a sweetheart from the day i met him, he never shyed away from expressing his fondness for the ones he loved. He died on 7 August 2014. His death was a massive blow to me and He is the reason i started this blog. This is his story.

Disclaimer: All incidents and facts stated in this post are loosely based on somebodies life. Be nice
Yes some facts have been exagerated and some even greater facts have been softened to suit the reader.

Every night in Krishnankutty Ammavan house was living hell for RC. RC was 17 when he started living with his fathers youngest brother. RC's dad had died when he was just 10 years old and his mother worked as an office staff in a small pvt company. Krishnankutty Ammavan shortened KK was short-tempered divorced and rich and RC had no one else to rely on. Staying with KK was a way to get a better college education and RC's mother was the one who suggested it as she knew she couldnt afford to pay for Raj's education.

RC was just 14 when it first happened. KK usually visited their home when Raj was a teen and since their house was small he was usually put up in Raj's room. RC remembers the first time it happened it was blackmail Raj stole some money from KK's wallet and KK found out and threatened to tell his mother. KK offered a way out he asked RC to make him happy and in return he would not tell his mother. This led to sex ....at first RC didnt even know it was wrong.. even while standing naked in front of KK he aways thought of KK as his uncle not the evil moster that he was. His uncle told him its just like sucking a lollypop and that he should do it to make him happy. But as the days went by KK used one or the other excuse to exploit RC. RC always told me how he wished that first time had never happened.

A lot of RC's miseries have to do with his personality too he was always a shy guy, he never spoke to girls, was always silent, had very few friends and was very studious. This put him in further disadvantage as when RC grew up KK offered to pay for his education. Moving into KK's house was the biggest mistake he made in his short life. In the first few weeks RC prayed that KK had forgotten what had happened in the past and in fact he rejoiced when nothing major happed for a while. But one night KK came home drunk and shouted abuses at RC. He made RC get naked like old times RC protested and started raising his voice....With a bang KK gave a massive blow to his head his eardrums satrted ringing and he felt faint. KK tore off his clothes and made him kneel in front of him, He popped out his thick black dick and spat on RC's face calling him an ungratefull fatherless dog. No matter how badly he wanted it to stop Raj knew he was a skeleton in front of this massive bull of a man. The sheer force with which KK held Raj's hair and forced his dick in and out of Raj's mouth made Raj gag and he vomited a bit onto KK's hardened dick ...Bang came another blow and abuses calling him a useless slut just like his mother.

This went on for a few months till Raj decided to tell his mother that he didnt want to stay with KK and he made excuses that he could study better if he could be put up in the college hostel and so Raj's mother pleaded with KK to pay for his hostel, strangely KK agreed. Years went by without incident and its in his last few years in college that i met him. He was a totally submissive bottom who though that sex was always forcefull and wild and abusive. Though online dating he found out that there were lots of guys like him and by meeting them he experienced more loving and caring relationships. Although he knew that he was gay he never was very active when it came to sex he rarely used the dating site through which i met him and he forever searched for caring a loyal friend who understood his sexuality yet respected him. Sadly he found none.

He got a job after college and started living with his mom again. But as they say people who are poor always remain helpless when his mother suddenly fell sick he had to rush to KK once again for help. One afternoon he called me his voice trembling he said that he didnt want to live anymore and that he was a big shit. I asked him what happened and he told me that after his mom was discharged from the hospital KK had called him home and this time KK was along with his friend both of them beat Raj up black and blue tied him and had violent sex with him and worse still KK took a video of RC getting fucked by the other guy. RC was unaware untill one afternoon KK called him again and when RC objected he showed him the video.

That was the last i heard from Raj he changed his number and as time went by i slowly forgot him. Almost a year later i got a call from the police saying that my number was saved on Raj's phone and that they were calling up everyone on the phonelist for the investigation. They said RC had lost his job and had commited suicide.